Friday, July 14, 2006

I'm Moving to Minneapolis.

There's nothing you can do. I know that this might upset a few of you, but it's something that's been building up in me for the last six years. I didn't realize how bad it has gotten here in Lincoln and how superior and heavenly a place like Minneapolis truly is. I mean you only have to take a few steps down the sidewalk (or the middle of the street) here in downtown Lincoln to realize how sub par this town really is. Or simply lie between parked motorcycles, cars, or restaurants on any downtown Lincoln street and just watch as the citizens of this town look at you in disgust and fear. Something that would never happen in Minneapolis, that's for sure. Or maybe you'd be inclined to stand on the sidewalk in front of a group of people dining or sharing drinks with their friends (who by the way always sit in packs of 12 or 9) to talk about your love for the greatest city on earth, Minneapolis, and you will find yourself dripping with whatever beverages maybe at hand. These are just a few examples of how unfriendly the people of Lincoln's true....look around you.

I know some of you are asking, "McQuBen you've done so, so, soooo many great things in this community. You make people laugh, you wear tight shorts, why would you go and throw it all away like this?" And to you I respond with, "you fucking liar, you only pretend to be concerned about me! You're just like all the other inferiors in this town, completely STUCK-UP!"

Only now have I finally found the inspiration and courage for my journey. Believe me I've always known that Minneapolis is the greatest city in the world and that Lincoln, NE pales in comparison, but I don't think that I would have grasped this big picture idea on my own...

The switch was flipped on sharply by a man I have the most incredible respect for, this man.

This man was quite jealous of the encounter.

In conclusion, I feel it is imperative for me to flee from this place to eat in fine restaurants such as Buca Di Beppo (far superior to rip-off establishments obviously trying to copy the use of garlic in it's dishes) and to walk the halls of million dollar museums. Enjoy your crappy city!

Thursday, July 13, 2006


A place where old women show off cleavage, a place where you find car batteries stacked on pallet-jacks and air-compressors chained to cinder blocks in the parking lot, this is a place where the bartender asks "a pitcher?...what flavor?", where I witnessed patrons who sang with such extreme passion, the hit song from the American rock group Deep Blue Something, "Breakfast at Tiffany's", a place where I imagine you could here the phrase "I made some pie, ya'll help yourselves", a place I charish, another place to call home. Earls!

Earl's Men's Room

Earl's Bike Crew

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

Mr Minneapolis

This guy needs a hug.

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Getting Nasty
On the night of July 10th 2006 (Kick Ball night) a night destined to end in a pile of mud on a county road somewhere near Bennet, NE. Five friends discovered a whole awful lot about some things. But that's just the ending....

"Hold on becca the water kinda smells like rasberries....I don't even like rasberries."

"Ahng aahhdon't know. Get nasty!"

Told ya.

Getting nasty sure is exhausting.

This is great!

"Get back here....I'm not done with you!"

Ladies, ladies......come on, I need to put those back on!

Who shit on Ashley? Come on guys....low blow. Not cool!

Schwerrve ohn.

Check out the grimacing look on this king crab! Look out for the left pincher there sailor Meg!

Who let the 4th grader eat all the echinasea root?

....and my teeth are made from black licorice and egg whites! YUM.

Monday, July 10, 2006

Out of these two gentlemen, who likes pie the most? and who likes beef brisket?

We hate pieah ha ha ha!

Hit me with some more sugar dawlin.

This kind of activity is rarely documented!

Mmmmmm pie has delicious clothes!

I love briskets....not pie, says Robbie.

Pie had gone into attack positioning. There was nothing more Patrick could do.

All photos were taken just minutes after something incredibly exciting happened. The excitement referred to in the last sentence was most definitely exciting.